Talking about that which is there

Azita: What’s a good way of introducing a small child to the Dhamma?

A. Sujin: Just talk about reality, that which is true, for example: what is there now, and she may say something. The first question is not the explanation about the truth yet, because she cannot understand it for sure, but you can say: is it real? What is real is real, but we don’t talk about the truth of that, as she cannot understand that yet. But she can understand dhamma: is this dhamma? It’s dhamma: it’s real, it tastes… what is it… sweet. Is it sweet? She says yes, and that is dhamma, or real. But even if you don’t use the word dhamma, you use the word in her language, she can understand that we are talking about that which is there, but not deep as it is yet. But she begins to understand that what is there is real. In the sense of everyone who can understand in the beginning, because we are talking about realities, but even the word reality is very hard to understand, because: what is it which is real? It’s real, but what nature is there? Before she can think about hardness or softness, something like that, it’s quite different from what has been accumulated, to take for something all the time, but that is the beginning of understanding, it’s this. You can use just one word, dhamma, and translate it into her own language, and then she answers, so you can know whether she understands about it or not, little by little.

When she’s sorry or something like that: is it real? She may say yes, so she understands that it’s real, even the feeling is real, pain, is it real? Yes, it is, and you can use her language for dhamma, dhamma, dhamma. She will learn to understand the word dhamma, even it’s not clear, very vague in the beginning, but she begins to understand that what is real is dhamma, and we go on little by little. But don’t teach her at all, because she cannot get it, rather something for her to think, about just one word, dhamma in her own language.

: So dhamma is reality.

A. Sujin: whatever is there, around her, like hardness, hardness is hard, so hardness is there, it’s dhamma, what is there, a reality, it’s dhamma. But she doesn’t know the reality or any further words at all, just know to understand that what is there is dhamma, to understand the word dhamma, even very little, in the beginning. Because it hasn’t been understood yet, so real, as hardness is only hardness and softness is only softness, but you can ask, are they different? Hardness is hard, softness is soft, are they real? Yes. Can you change hardness to be softness, and so on, little by little. Instead of trying very hard to cause her to have understanding. But now and then just ask her whether this is different from that, and so on. But you understand your granddaughter better than any other, and don’t try to cause her to have understanding right then at all.

: …this is hardness, this is visible object, I think this are good starter words for anybody.

A. Sujin: Even so, I think that she won’t get much of it. Only just sometimes hear this word, and then that word, and the difference between different words. Are they real? Is this real? At this moment when there is seeing, does she think about it or not? But I think it’s too difficult for anyone, in the beginning, not only for the children, and the children can only understand very little, not as much as adults, that’s why: don’t force and don’t try. But show them the truth little by little, just then.

And don’t rush her to have her more and more, it’s impossible. Best wishes for her is to let her hear some words and think about something when it is there. No expectations for more understanding or anything, because it’s not time yet.