Understanding the truth of life is to understand what is there now

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[A. Sujin] So there must be the understanding of the Buddha's words of truth, like what is there now. The other moment, the moment before this has gone and that which hadn't come yet is now present moment and gone, unknowingly, no understanding of the truth. It's so true that the moment of seeing is not the moment of hearing, not the moment of thinking. When they are not known there must be ignorance of that which experiences as I: I like, I dislike, but if liking does not arise how can there be "I like"? "I know", when there's no understanding at all, can there be "I know" or "I understand"?

And if one follows a method, how can there be the understanding of what is there? Even at the meditation center there must be seeing hearing smelling tasting touching. But there are two different kinds of idea, of thinking: wrong understanding, right understanding.

So, no matter where, when there is a reality there, it depends on ignorance or right understanding of the truth of it because it's so true, but what is the truth of it? It is there by conditions, just appearing and then disappears instantly, this is the absolute truth. This is the way to let go of the idea of self, but the intention is not just to let go the idea of self, but to understand the truth and even that which understands is not me, it's a reality different from ignorance.

That's why we learn to understand any moment because it's so true what is there, what are there, like citta (consciousness) and cetasikas (mental factors) arising together. It depends on whether it is the development of understanding the truth of citta, so it is citta-anupassana-satipatthana (one of the four bases of sati), and when it's dhamma[-anupassana]: anything, no matter what arises and falls away in different manners, [it] can be known as non-self. Anywhere. To let go, otherwise just thinking to let go somewhere and something, it's not the real letting go of wrong understanding at all because [at] other times it's there again.

That's why before doing anything or thinking that "I can do" there should be the understanding of what is there, from the very beginning. To consider carefully, wisely, of the truth, about the truth, the absolute truth [that] nobody can change. Even while we are talking there are seeings, moments of seeing arising and falling away, unknown. We do not make them arise no one can make it arise but it's there by conditions and there are so many different conditions for each moment to be known, to be learned, to understand the truth: no one there at all. That's why in truth what is appearing? One is that which experiences the other is that which cannot experience anything. Is it not true even right now, at this moment?

[Sita] It's true, it's happening now.

[A. Sujin] And there can be moment of beginning to have confidence of the truth of it, little by little. Very natural, as natural as by conditions. Even thinking right now it's conditioned, while we think differently, different ideas. To learn that actually there is no one and no thing, what we take for me or people or things are only different realities, arising. They appear and disappear instantly, so rapidly that it's not known as it is, as: actually that which is seen is so very very minute, very subtle, not just everything appearing together.

But the proof is that as soon as one closes one's eyes they're all gone, what is appearing now, every one. No window, no bed or shoe all in a sudden... never there because no seeing of just one single reality at a time: so rapidly that forms up the shape and form to be known as something. That's why it is nimitta, just the sign or the mark of that which is arising and falling away in very rapid succession or rapidity.

And that can be known because the Buddha has developed his understanding with paramis (perfections) [for] so long, to understand the truth. And after his enlightenment he said: dhammas are so very subtle, very very difficult to discern, to understand, but they can be understood, so he taught the way and that is the understanding from the very beginning, to understand [that] it's so true. And when the confidence of the truth is strong enough, we don't know when, it will condition moment of direct awareness which is satipatthana, with understanding, otherwise it's useless, it cannot be satipatthana when it cannot understand the truth of just one reality which appears, which can later appear better and better, clearer and clearer and what the Buddha said will be so true: it's only a moment of experiencing an object and what is meant by an object: no other thing there at all, [a] different world. No world of things and people anymore because just understanding one characteristic at a time which is different from just beginning to learn about it, that now seeing it's not hearing, it's not thinking. But even so, so many moments of seeing can be known as the mark or the sign of seeing: the nimitta of seeing. Because just one single reality cannot be known according to the process of experiencing an object one moment at a time, otherwise it doesn't mean enlightenment at all.

So, in the Buddha's times no place to be called meditation center at all because the truth can be known anytime by conditions. Without any understanding at all, how it can condition moment of direct awareness of just a reality right now, not other realities together, just one only?

And by then it's known as satipatthana because it begins to understand that characteristic of which is aware, just one at a time. For example, hardness now, does it appear? One at a time, at that moment nothing can appear at all, no flower no house, no window, nothing, no sound because only one at a time. Otherwise it cannot lead to the experiencing, penetrating the truth which is now arising and falling away all the time, so rapidly. If that is not developed to that degree, it cannot eradicate the idea of self which has been accumulated eons and eons ago, uncountable. And more and more in next lives, when there will be no understanding at all.

But there's no other way, only what the Buddha said. There must be pariyatti (intellectual understanding), so skillful in understanding the truth of the four noble truths, what is meant by dukkha-ariya-sacca and the condition of dukkha is there: attachment, with ignorance.

Now who knows that there is attachment to the object which is seen already, by conditions, by the accumulations. So very subtle, as āsava (subtle defilements). That's why we feel all the time "*I* see", " I hear", "I think" because of that which arises three moments after seeing or hearing, or whatever through the sense-doors, unknown but it's there: "I'm seeing now", "I'm hearing now". Even [if] no word is there, none: "I" at moment of seeing, at moment of hearing. That's why if there is not enough confidence of the truth there is no condition for direct awareness with understanding to begin to understand directly the object as it is, until it can appear, just one, you can't imagine what is meant [by]: only one single object.

And the experiencing, not the same reality: one experiences and the other cannot experience. No doubt about the nature of that which is not that which can experience the object and that which experiences an object, even that they're two. For example right now, hardness is only hardness when it is experienced: no desk, no computer, nothing at all, but it cannot experience an object and at that very moment that which experiences it doesn't have shape and form and color or visible object at all. No doubt about what is that reality which has no shape and form at all, just experiencing: arising, experiencing, that's all. Not the same one, not the single one: like seeing, hearing, only one cannot be the object because it has to be nimitta by way of the arising and falling away conditioning that which can be known as this or that.

No need to go anywhere at all: anytime anyplace, as the Buddha said. It's useful, it's beneficial to have conditions for direct awareness with direct understanding of that very object which [awareness] is aware of anytime, by conditions. That's the way to let go the idea of self or permanent thing as it appears as roses, or table or chairs. In truth no-thing no-one, and even that which arises and experience falls away, never to return. Just consider whether it's true or not, only that, nothing to do! Because no one there: right understanding performs its function of understanding on and on and on, when it's there. But when it's not there, if someone tries so hard to know it, to do it the way that they think, can it lead to understanding? It's impossible because understanding means now. What level? Intellectual understanding, there is seeing which sees, no one.

It is the time to develop the understanding of the characteristic which is there from birth, arising and falling away on and on to the moment of death and on and on after death. No one can stop the conditions for the arising and falling away of that which now arises and experiences an object all the time Never lost. All there by conditions. even while one is fast asleep or just wake up or at any time, it's there, different realities, by conditions. And this is the beginning to have firm confidence of the truth because there're always moments of forgetting about the truth, all the time. Very few moments, by conditions, and more, by conditions, or it can understand any object be aware by conditions, all by conditions. Who knows what condition will be next moment.

[Sita] Thank you.

[A. Sujin] So, going somewhere thinking that it's a place very suitable for the development of understanding, is it right? Expectations are there, unknowingly. Attachment is there, unknowingly. But pañña, right understanding, begins to understand the characteristic which conditions dukkha ariya-sacca, it's there. That's why understanding changes the way of life, little by little, unknowingly, by conditions, not by me trying so hard to change. And without this level of understanding can there be more realization of the truth? Impossible.

That's why there are the 12 rounds of ariya-sacca: 1st rounds of intellectual understanding, of the four noble truths, and the 2nd rounds, patipatti: directly understanding the truth of whatever is now appearing, and the third, pativedha, the realization of the truths. Unexpectedly, otherwise it cannot let go the idea of self at all: "I can do", "I have done it", "I'll try" and so on, it's wrong. Because it cannot let go of the idea of self in the five khandhas: rupa khandha, vedana khandha, sañña khandha, sankhara khandha, viññana khandha. All five means any moment, every moment when there's no understanding [of] what is there, ignorance and attachment for sure, very very subtle, as āsava.

That's why learn to understand the words of the Enlightened One because he taught the absolute truth that can be realized because it's now there. Without his words, no understanding about its truth at all.

So, what is true is this very moment: what is there is so true, so real, seeing is dhamma, a dhamma. Anything which is real, which is conditioned to arise, to be such reality, nobody can change the way it is at all, it's dhamma. We think what we think, but what is there? A reality experiencing thought or idea or something, how many cetasikas (mental factors)? And what cetasika performs the function of thinking in such way? Because there are many many realities as many many many mental factors, everything cannot be the same, the same one or single one, the same object, but can be [of the] same kind. Citta is citta, but it's different by [the] cetasikas which arise with it, the citta before seeing cannot see, so the seeing has different cetasikas, not as the ones which arises before seeing. Learn to understand little by little, to have more confidence of the truth, that's all.

[...] in this life because the ignorance attachment has been accumulated, how long for? So, how can it be all eradicated so soon, in this life? Impossible. The truth is the truth: understanding is understanding, ignorance is ignorance, attachment is attachment. Whether it's known or not, nobody can change the way it is. Because actually there's no one at all and no thing, only different realities, from life to life, moment to moment. And that is the meaning of anatta and dhammas: all dharmas are anatta, more confidence of the truth.

[Sita] Thank you so much.

[A. Sujin] No matter what kind of feeling is there and then gone

[Sita] When I meditate I see so many things happening...

[A. Sujin] Who conditions that? Who conditioned such happenings? No one. But wrong understanding is there, wrong understanding is there. What did you see?

[Sita] Sometimes when I close my eyes I see the past experiences and then when you open your eyes it was only like an illusion, it was gone it was and you are in the present moment, then you realize that ah... that was the past and then you leave for the present moment and that enables you to see clearly.

[A. Sujin] Is there any understanding of that?

[Sita] Yes, you understand that you leave now, you live for the present moment and that was the past and it's gone.

[A. Sujin] If it's so true, why do you have to go to meditation center?

[Sita] I go there for... I read books, I read the suttas and then I walk in the path, so I go there for the retreat so that... I help with the dhamma work also there, every year when I go there.

[A. Sujin] But is it told to do like that, in Tipitaka? Did the Buddha say anything about going to meditation center and do this and that?

[Sita] No, no.

[A. Sujin] Wrong or right? Because the truth is the truth anywhere, anytime, any moment, by conditions. But when there is the idea of going somewhere, it's not by conditions it's by the idea of going there, expectation is there, to get something for self. Not letting go. No understanding naturally, by conditions, unexpectedly because there are conditions for that moment to arise no one is there to do it or to condition it or make it up.

[Sita] Because I thought it's a dhamma, I go and help them, I help them to sew their meditation covers for the sitting meditation and by doing it I feel the joy of helping.

[A. Sujin] Yes, but what is the truth of that? Is it you?

[Sita] Because I do my meditation there once a year in the retreat that is for me a joy to to help them, to give back in return.

[A. Sujin] And what is joy? Is it you?

[Sita] It gives me joy and I found it's the truth.

[A. Sujin] What is the truth of joy?

[Sita] It's a dhamma.

[A. Sujin] Not you. Or you? What about "all dhammas are anatta"? No "me" no "mine", not mine at all. Dhamma does not belong to anyone because it's conditioned to arise, as soon as it has arisen it falls away, never to return at all. Can it be I? Or it is just a conditioned dhamma? And when it is so true, the truth can be this moment. Why going to meditation center? Is there any expectation to have something, to have joy? But no understanding of what is there now. So what is so true, that which is conditioned, not that [which] I'd like to do.

It's very important to be truthful to the truth, otherwise there cannot be the realization of whatever is now, the ten paramis are so important too because only right understanding itself cannot arise without the support of many conditions. To be so truthful to the truth. The truth is truth, no matter where.

Even one does not go to meditation center, but there can be the understanding of what is said, unexpectedly, and only by [being] unexpected it can condition more confidence of the truth, that it does not belong to anyone understanding what it's meant by dhamma it's clearer that it's dhamma and what is dhamma? No one and no thing and no self. Even joy is not me, seeing it's not me, everything is not me. Otherwise, this is me: I'm so very happy, very pleasant and what about the other? At moment of like or dislike? In a day, attached to the sensuous object as conditioned. To understand: because it's conditioned it cannot be taken for anyone at all. Because it arises and then gone. It arises by conditions, as soon as it has arisen, by conditions, it's gone, no condition for it anymore.

[Sita] Thank you, that means the joy, that is not me. I'll help in the dhamma, that was the joy then.

[A. Sujin] All dhammas, what is there at that very moment, it's so real, it is conditioned to arise and fall way instantly, never to return at all, nothing can be taken for I or things lasting at all. Is that not true? Just be truthful to the truth.

[Sita] Thank you, Ajahn Sujin, to realize that...

[A. Sujin] Just considered it again and again and again, that's the way to understand what is true and what is not true. And what is the object of attachment, so very tricky. Because it's attachment to the pleasant feeling. No matter it is the attachment to the pleasant feeling, or dosa, disliking it, no matter what, as long as there is no understanding of the truth it's me. Because who can be there? The moment of that which experience an object and no one, so it's me. But actually no me when there is the understanding, but wrong understanding has been accumulated [for] quite so long.

So, right understanding understands the way because it is one of the four noble truths. it is now, this moment of beginning to consider what is so true and it's so very difficult to let go because it has been accumulated [for] so long, in a day.

So, firstly there should be the understanding of the truth more and more, to condition moment of direct awareness with right understanding. But at meditation centers, is there any condition for direct awareness of whatever is there? It's only waiting for strange happenings and liking it and being attached to it, but what about the understanding of what is there now? Life exists in a moment only. To understand life, the truth of life, is understanding what is there now, in a moment. Otherwise, can we say that that is right understanding, when there's no understanding of what is there now at all?

But at this very moment learn to understand the truth, it's there by conditions, no matter what. No one can make it arise because it's there already, like seeing right now, while we are talking, it's there. so everything is conditioned and conditions can be learned little by little. What conditions what, like seeing cannot arise at all without the eye-base and without that which can impinge on the eye-base, which condition the reality arising to experience it. Just to experience, to see only, it cannot think, it cannot lie, it's just that which experiences an object.

And... first of all, if there's no right understanding of that which experiences and that which cannot experience, the rupa, how can there be letting go of things around and people around and the world, what are there in the world? So the truth is the truth, but it's not easy to realize the truth, to penetrate what is there now, arising and falling away secretly, unknowingly. What appears is only the sign or the mark of the reality as one characteristic, and together, as form and shape to be taken for something, making it[self] known as this or that.

[Sita] It grows slowly, understanding it's realizing it and understanding it at a deeper level, it's a continuous process.

[A. Sujin] That's why the Buddha taught about the ten paramis: being truthful to the truth, to have confidence, with viriya and khanti. Not to do anything because it has to be as it's conditioned [to be], as it has been accumulated.

Thank you, Ajahn Sujin.

My pleasure.